Love your muff

Edwina Ings-Chambers wrote an interesting, albeit disturbing, article in this week’s Sunday Times about 12 year old girls now believing it is essential to remove their pubic hair, in order to be accepted in their peer group.  I remember when the first signs of pubic hair were an exciting mark of becoming a woman.  Now, it seems, women aspire to look like little girls, and little girls have to revert to their pre-pubescent state to feel acceptable.

Most disturbing of all was the accompanying piece by Andy Jones who asserts that “all twenty-something men have a preference when it comes to female grooming … We know what we like and we aren’t shy of debating it in the pub”.  Female pubic waxing is essential, he says, because “Men, egged on by pornography, have come to expect, nay demand, it”.  Seriously?  I know I’m no twenty-something, but when did men become so shallow and prissy? Are men are really so conditioned by porn that they can no longer bear to look at a woman’s vulva in its natural state?

And when oh when did women start believing they had to buy into such self-esteem lowering (not to mention creepy) nonsense?  If porn is really the benchmark by which we’re supposed to judge sexual acceptability, then I doubt very much that many of these men who have nothing better to discuss in the pub than the supposed unacceptability of women’s bodies actually … ahem … measure up themselves.  Any woman who finds herself, in Andy Jones’ words, dumped for not being ‘well-kept’ should tell the sorry excuse for a bloke to put that in his pipe and smoke it.

UPDATE 22/8/12

Here’s a very recent view from a doctor (director of the health centre at Western University in Washington State) underscoring my view that removing genital hair completely has adverse health and STI implications:

http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/physician-calls-for-an-end-to-bikini-waxing-8008628.html

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2 thoughts on “Love your muff

  1. There is some irony in the immature school ground taunts of men’s penis size issues here… I thought the original article may be interesting (if disturbing) but see that the view is extremely linea. Why would girls do this? I would suggest their (female) friends pressure them to do it, this is the direct influence, with their influence coming from wider society (mainly male) pressures from the adult industry.

    The author seems to relate the act to looking pre pubescent etc but fails to take into account both trends and fashion. Would we liken the same accusation to the act of a male shaving their face?

    • Hi Dan, thanks for your comment. I was being tongue-in-cheek about the penis-size thing – sorry if that didn’t come across well enough. As a sex therapist, I am very aware that penis size has very little to do with sexual enjoyment and that many men seem to worry about this issue far more than it ever figures in women’s discourse – the women I see, anyway. I was just trying to highlight the inherent irony if men and women believe women’s genitals need to look like those in the porn industry, when most men’s clearly don’t.

      You make a good point about the facial hair and I did spend some time debating that one internally myself before I posted. I think the conclusion I came to is that any of us might be entitled to request that a partner keep the hair on their head, their faces, their noses, their ears or their genitals somewhat neat and tidy for aesthetic purposes … not many of us find the Worzel Gummidge look appealing … but that this seems to me to be several steps away from a wholesale insistence that girls and women remove all of their pubic hair, to fit in with societal norms, or face being “dumped”. But I do understand why you might think trends and fashion are relevant here.

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